Stop Being a People Pleaser

I walked into the room.

It was full of people I didn’t know.

When I say ‘full of people’ what I mean is there were 11 others, 10 unknown, one known plus two staff in the background. You might guess that this wasn’t your ordinary dinner invite.

I had the invitation last minute. Someone else had cancelled and the host asked if I could come - I said yes. Naturally, I wanted to make a good impression, and wanted those people to like and accept me.

It went well for the most part, until we got to politics. I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I wasn’t angry or shouting, just voicing my opinion and standing up for my beliefs.

The atmosphere changed.

Before, I had made light conversation, politely nodding, and being interested in what the others were sharing. Now, though, I had made a stand.

And, incredibly, they wanted more of me. They had been nice before, but now I had their full attention. It went against everything I knew and couldn’t believe that being open about who I am would have that effect.

An evening I will cherish forever.

Have you ever experienced the joy and power of being your true self?

When you let go of others’ expectations and just did what you wanted to do? Mindfully, respectfully, of course, not causing harm or bullying others.

Letting your hair down.

Or putting it up. Unexpected to those who profess to know you - and really don’t.

How did your friends, colleagues, family, whoever was in the room with you react? Were they shocked? Pleased? Excited? Stunned? Angry?

How did you feel?

Gorgeous? Desired? At your centre? Truly alive? Invincible? Stunning? Exhilarated? Liberated?

I truly hope you have had that feeling at least once in your life! Because the energy you get from those moments is incredible.

The moment you let go of expectations and behave like you believe is right, say the things that matter to you and stick to your values, you are your true self.

So, stop being a people pleaser!

Once and for all.

Why do you do it? Why do you think you need to put on an act so everyone likes you?

Hasn’t your experience showed you time and time again that people are much more loyal to the real you? Much more interested? Much more committed?

Why this farce?

Please know I’m not accusing you!

If anything I’m accusing myself - for being a people pleaser and not standing up and saying what I want to say. Doing what I want to do.

We are scared to do anything outside of our learned behaviour. Scared to hurt our parents, partners and friends. We’re so scared we do everything to please others. So they might think well of us. And treat us kindly in return.

Truth is...

When you put yourself first, you will get to know yourself. Your values and beliefs. You’ll be happier and at your centre.

Give yourself permission to be the real you.

To get started, head over here to get access to my video, giving you three strategies to put yourself first (and a little reminder of why that’s important!).

Or how about we have a chat? No obligations - but many questions asked (about your well-being). Click here to book a date in my diary.

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